Wednesday, May 11, 2011

The End of the Third

This is the last week of the school year. Graduation is on Saturday, students have to be moved out by Sunday at 5p. I'm just counting down the days until I can relax. I need to fill out my leave slip and actually go on some vacations. I need time off. Time to not think about the building, or the people I work with, or anything.

Time to think about what I'm going to do next.

I really don't know what the next step is, I just know that it shouldn't be here. Actually it can't be here because there is no room for growth. i'll never be anything at [my university] except for a Community Director. That was fine in the short-term but let's face, I'm not getting any younger. I'll be 31 this year, and part of the reason for my hesitation is that this job allows me to act like I'm still 25. There's a minimum of responsibilities, only a modicum of facetime needed outside of my building, and the oldest person I interact with is about 22. I'm stuck in a workplace Neverland, never having to grow up because no one's pushing me out of the bed.

Time to wake up.

I like this job most days. I only get up before the sun rises if I feel like doing it, and even on those days I can generally catch a nap before I'm forced to be productive. I watch television. My workplace attire is usually shorts and a hoodie (year-round). There's no pressure to be anything more, and I respond accordingly.

But, like I said earlier, I'll be 31 this year and I can't play it this cool forever. I always thought that by this time in my life I'd be making a living as a writer, but that hasn't happened because I've never tried. I see now that I'll just have to stop putting my toe in the ocean and just dive right in, because as much as I like this job $31,000 does not allow for much of a life.

I'm not saying that there won't be a fourth year. I'd be foolish to say that I'm leaving without any idea of where I'm going. What I am saying is that my "kind-of" job search needs to grow into a full on job search. If I can't find anything, THEN I will come back. This is my secure Plan B, not my primary option.

Legal Note: Opinions in this post are my own and not representative of the university I work for or the people I work under. All suppositions, presumptions, theories, hypotheses, etc. are my own. This blog is for entertainment purposes only, blah blah blah. There are purposely no names included in this post, and I have revealed nothing that violates either general expectations of privacy or the University confidentiality agreement, which, actually... I never signed anyway. All of that is to say...don't be trying to sue me.